Sometimes I wish I could be gray. I wish I could hide, that no one would see me, I wish I could disappear. I wish I was in my own little world with my own rules and with my own understanding of what's right and what's wrong. But gray is the complete opposite of who I am and who I want to be. I always stand out in a crowd, I always take charge of everyone, I'm always the one who's everything but gray. I guess I'm just tired of it all and right now all I want is to REST! This year has been just too intense and I wish that I could just stop the time for a moment, or more than a moment. I just need a week or two off. I need some time for myself, I want to be more selfish and do things for me, not to others, I need to relax, I need to be the one who's standing aside. I want to be gray. Just for a moment, for a week or two, I need to disconnect from life around me and live just for myself. Is that really so selfish?